Who are these Turtles?

I got to wondering the other day, does anyone in Santa Barbara know what a Conservative is? Are there any here?

Yes, some of us are still here, those that have weathered the hurricane of progressive liberalism that blew into Santa Barbara in the 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, and 90’s.

Have you ever walked by the little fountain pond in La Arcada Plaza and seen those strange, seemingly harmless, thick-skinned creatures? That’s us. The Conservative Turtles.

Not so many remain; we are nearly extinct. But we are here, some retracted into our shells, often hiding under rocks - those of us that have not thrown up their claws and left for the open sea, or for more tolerable and politically habitable ponds in other lands.

Those few that do remain have mostly been rounded up by the outspoken liberal and progressive activists and placed in a pond with high walls in an attempt to contain and control yet another endangered species. They have learned to control us with the walls of political correctness and intimidation. Despite the Grand American Ideal of free speech, we haven’t dared speak our mind for a while.

You may have forgotten us, you may not notice us, you may think we are insignificant. But we are here. We are watching, taking note, waiting for the political tides to turn.

Turtles are naturally shy and soft-spoken. Many consider our slow, cautious, thoughtful movements to be boring, dated, and out of step with the pace of modern life. Most of us are too busy with our careers and families to be active in politics. We like the way our life is. We don’t want to “progress” anywhere. Meanwhile the progressives and minority interest groups have wrested control, public safety is increasingly in jeopardy, and we have almost had enough.

But we have been afraid. The world has become a dangerous place for turtles. We don’t like to stick our necks out. We fear someone from another culture will come along and pluck us from our pond and maul and torture us, just because they don’t like turtles. This happened in Ventura a little while ago to our uncle, Bob the Tortoise, who was cut out of his shell by a sick punk teenager named Jose Mosqueda. We wonder how long before it happens to one of us - just because someone doesn’t understand turtles, or the way of life they and their Fore-turtles worked, fought, and died for.

The city and the world is not what we grew up with, not what we recognize, not what we any longer feel comfortable with. It is a different culture, polluted by the strange new worship of “multi-culturalism” and “tolerance”. We have watched from our pond as these ideas have come to dissolve the glue of a single culture and language that has in the past bound all that come from foreign lands into a single strong People of the United States of America. Instead, we now do everything possible to assure they remain segregated and disadvantaged by retaining only their native language and culture.

We dream of a world where political correctness is no longer the law that governs speech, and we can once again feel comfortable exercising the Constitutional Rights established by our Fore-turtles. A city where we can actually speak the truth and what we think, without the filter of the barking liberal and progressive media and the specter of political correctness, with it’s associated character assassination.

We reminisce and dream of a return to a city where the importance of law enforcement and public safety override the blind pursuit of fads and manias and the unwritten new rules of “tolerance”, “understanding” and “compassion and rights for criminals”.

We will no longer be intimidated. We will no longer be inhibited when our words are twisted by the slanderous name-calling left. We have come to expect that, and now we know the game. We have had enough, and we are now immune to names like “homophobic”, “sexist”, “racist”, “hater”, “right winger”, “hate monger”, “war monger”, or any and every other kind of monger. We are confident enough in our self beliefs to know that these names do not reflect reality, but are used by special interest groups in an attempt to intimidate us, and to discount what we have to say if we resist their agendas. We now consider these names badges of honor, because they show that we have successfully irritated another socialist political opportunist. The turtles will begin to remerge from their shells and take back America one city at a time.

Turtles of Santa Barbara, you now have a voice. Click the "View complete Profile" link above for our email address, to leave your feedback, thoughts, your concerns, your ideas, your support, or leave a comment to this post below. The rebellion has begun. Slow and steady wins the race.